Avoid These Mistakes In A Verbal Self-defence

Avoid These Mistakes In A Verbal Self-defence
Jackson Simmer

What I am going to share in this article is for everyone, who once was a student, it's about you. 

When someone emits stupid words on you, the way you feel, I know that.

Or I can say, the worst feeling in the world that happens every time, every second to anyone. 

Think by yourself, how do you react if someone abuses you or disturbs you with an annoying question?

  • Do you try to prove them wrong?
  • Criticize back sarcastically?
  • Punch on their face? (Well this is my personal favourite but I resist)


  • Walk away?

You may say walking away would be the best choice or a sign of cowardness. I will get to it.

What about criticizing back? It's a trend now to answer back with a sarcastic tone. Am I right?

I love it too. But, anyway, that doesn't work and you know that very well.

Trying to prove them wrong is the best choice for some people to answer. But it gets worse again because you are ignoring your self-dignity to just prove a point. It is justifiable?

Let's come to the last choice,

Avoid These Mistakes In A Verbal Self-defence
Sinitta Leunen

Punching on his/her face
is the first thought that comes to our mind. Sometimes we handle it and sometimes we don't(other choices). However, if you can't control your anger and attack them furiously(pure violence) what will you get?

Just a short moment of satisfaction, plus hurting your hand plus, you get a punch back too. After a while, you discover some absence of gratification. That you did something wrong.

Try to mesmerize this.
"Sometimes non-violence sucks, but it won't suck your life!"

Click to Tweet

This shows a way to get forward now.

See verbal attackers are like an opportunity for us. And if you answer them back in the same manner, "BOOM" you are hired in an argument service agency. But the fact is that you won't get anything from this job. No money, unproductivity, disturbed mind, angry mood, and so on.

And those who hire you are already experts in their jobs.

Instead, why don't you learn yours? Which is VERBAL SELF-DEFENCE.

Yes, we all want this deep inside. In fact, we commit the above four mistakes because we are unaware of the right defence system.

Then Let's discuss the right ones...

These secret steps will change the way you think. Forever!

  • Firstly Stay calm and perform those three basic parts.

  1. Just breathe naturally and relax.
  2. Try to listen to the main issue.
  3. If they comment on your weakness don't let them know you got irritated. Just observe.

  • Know-How To Respond
Avoid These Mistakes In A Verbal Self-defence
Olivia Hutcherson

It's obvious if you respond in an offensive expression, as I stated above, that would be a long useless part of a novel which you prefer not to buy.

When someone intentionally tries to throw their words at me with a funny or senseless subject, I just answer neutrally with my full attention. I accept their statement as some truth but deep inside I just assume like finding 'x' in mathematics to solve that problem and then, "bingo!" I find the truth, unwrapped with a casual conversation. I find out why they did this glitch glowing act.

For example:

Her: Hey Pratik, you know what, your relationship with exercise will kill you.

Me: Oh how? (calmly)

And as I follow her words to a new temporary assumption, I will end my conversation getting the right statements.

This conversation can go wrong if;

Her: Hey buddy, you know what? your relationship with that girl will hurt you.

Me: I am not free for this useless talk. I like her.

Her: I think my words are all useless to you.

Me: No it's not. I didn't say that.

Her: yes you did!

Me: I did not, I just…

(Argument started)

(Wish me luck then!)

See it all starts with just a wrong sentence.

Debating, arguing, pleading and attacking back are some errors in an effective communication strategy.

  • Elevate the conversation with fancy empty topics

When domestic people verbally attack you and you walk away or didn't say a word will give them a sign that you don't mind it. And that's what they get it wrong(for some of you it really doesn't matter, but what's important is you want them to shut up or they will make a habit to annoy you and you will make yours). You will become a target when days pass.

Instead of trying to lock yourself as their target, try to answer by simply elevating and connecting to another story that bores them. 

For example:

"Gamer: Dude, how can you be so bad in the shooting, you suck man.

Developer: Yeah bro. You know what, it all started when I learned my programming language. My first was java. No wait, it's C++, no no no wait its HTML. Maybe that's why I started playing outdoor games too. I loved playing football. Kicking those balls with a calculated power to hit a proper distance on time. Oh, those days! Playing in fields of different schools and winning tour….

Gamer: I gotta go, buddy, See ya."

And then our developer got to work peacefully with a little nostalgia.

Try it with your style. Abusers will never open a word next time. 

Sometimes people don't have other entertainment stuff to do. So, they do annoying fun to refresh their mind by throwing disturbing words on you.

And no one wants to know your story. If your close ones do that, you need to talk to them!

There are even more ways of verbal self-defence which I didn't mention because of their usage in some different kinds of situations which can be rare.

But I will get them for you.

Till then, stay connected. 



Feel free to share your thoughts!


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